Home Again, Home Again

Well, Josh is back from he second weekend at Camp Grandma and Grandpa D's in W. Laf. I'm getting better at this, but it still feels so odd. Twenty minutes after I drop him off and am on the road, and twenty minutes after I get home, I'm a little on edge... I think right after I kissed Jon hello, I went to the storage box where the Doppelganger/Fake Josh was kept, and took him/it directly into Josh's crib...so that when I woke up
around three to do my habitual nightly wandering, that I would not freak out when there was no little person in the crib. Jon smiled at me fondly, shook his head and took me into his arms. He was delighted with quiet, "us-time", and if I'm being honest, I needed to be unattached SOOOOOO badly. Dull Surprise, Josh is going through another growth spurt. (I know, I know -- when ISN'T he going through another growth spurt). These are always the signals of the really rough patches...in one of my endless forays into useless trivia (-- kind of a carry-over from my many years of teen-age insomnia...I'm pretty sure I know something odd about everything... but I just know I'm totally going to freeze up when I get to that final round of Jeopardy ), I thought I read that growing pains really and truly can hurt...It would make sense, Josh is fussier, much crankier about sleeping, and constantly nursing during a "spurt" (and the books said that was also a good way to naturally ease pain in babies) and for a day and a half-prior to the Grandma Weekend, I felt utterly cornered and raw. Half of me wanted to snuggle and half of me just wanted to find the most isolated mountain peak in Tibet and never be touched again. It's kind of jarring to Jon, who has gotten used to much snuggling and head-rubbing in the days before Josh (again, I am completely convinced Jon was a big ol' cat in another life)...and when I get to this stage, I can barely even stand being held by him...after a couple of hours without Josh hooked up to the Mommy Keg, my hackles go down and I relax, and then I remember how good snuggling is. In an odd way, I suppose that I will shortly be wistful even for the never-ending nursing jags. Josh is learning to be mobile, and God help me when it's official. The last several days, he's begun this inchworm bit (and yes, Danny Kaye is singing softly in my head everytime I watch Josh master his new moves), where he will hitch up his hips and try to scoot a few inches ahead. He can do baby push-ups and those inchworm-moves, but hasn't yet connected the two. He has, however perfected his "backstroke" to the point where he scared the crap out of G.Aunt Helen the other day. Apparently, Josh was lying on the floor in their living room, where Helen and Harry usually watch and play with him. She stepped out of the room to grab something off of a nearby table, and came back into the living room to find that Josh had disappeared. After a moment of near heart-failure, she heard a noise under an armchair, and saw two happy legs kicking out from underneath it. Josh was utterly fascinated with whatever was under the armchair, and Helen calmed herself out of the rafters. I know, I should be horrified, but at this time, knowing he can't get far yet, I think it's pretty funny...even so, I'm going to regret my amusement all too soon. He's strong and he's fast, and because I am still overwhelmed by it all (and, if I'm honest, I've kind of been stalling on the whole process)...I haven't proofed the house yet. I am contemplating a Child-Proof-My-House-Party, but I really am trying to get myself into gear. My biggest fears right now are the laptop and the desktop...the two things we use the most, and what I'm certain will be the first casualties when Josh begins his ramblings. Both are in the living room, and I haven't figured out a way to protect them...I mean, we can take the keyboard off the desktop when it isn't in use...and maybe pack the laptop away all the time, but we'd be in rough straits if anything happened to those. (Any suggestions on this matter would be appreciated, seriously.) Helen and Harry have Josh until 7:30, and Jon's pulling overtime tonight, so I have an hour and a half left to myself. I think I will do something really dramatic and hurl myself into the tub to de-scuzzify myself, and then I will see what I can beat a path through....



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June 19, 2005 Well, Josh is now officially 17 pounds, 8 oz., and 28 inches long. According to Tim, and several others, there are two year olds that aren't as big (long) as Josh. Josh has become quite adept at rolling back and forth...and will play around on his stomach for about twenty minutes or so, but the biggest change is that Josh can now sit up right...his balance is still off (as is my speed...the poor little fellow conked his head a couple of times when he overbalanced one way, and I had erred and tried to spot him on the other side. He pouted, and yelped his displeasure, and then went back to more pressing things), so the majority of the time, I am putting the Boppy pillow to good use, as it rings around him and supports him as he sits up, and then he can play with one of his gyms, and I can fold towels beside him. He leans in and "kisses" the smiley-faces...he kicks, he bats...he drools. He is pickier about what will make him laugh now...some things, like a little razzie around the ears or belly are givens, but he's now developed a polite, reserved smile -- as though he knows a smile is expected, "but really, dear Mummy, you simply must come up with some original material." He all but pats me on the head and offers a cookie. And then, he chews on his feet. I'm trying very hard to break myself of the habit of watching television...the books keep saying my routines will become Josh's routines, and while I haven't really been able to focus much on what I've been watching in the last several months, I've never been able to break myself of the need for background noise (a carryover from being from such a large family, I guess). I'm getting better. The television is still on, but it's tuned into the "screensaver" XM Radio channels...the screen goes black after a few minutes, and Josh and I sing and dance to the the kids songs until around two...ideally, he naps, and then we hit it from there... We (Jon and I) have been addicted to the Kenny Curtis Animal Farm on XMKids, and one of the audio characters in the "petting zoo" is a paranoid llama named Lorenzo , who has the catchphrase "Don't Touch the Llama!!! There is NO Touching of the Llama", and we've incorporated that into our daily conversations. (Yes, Suz, the llama has a father named "Fernando" who tells everyone they look mah-vel-ous! Could Billy Crystal sue a llama for borrowing his shtick? I hope not. I'd never be able to watch Princess Bride again if he did) "Don't Touch the Llama" and "Llama-toucher!" are now our most-loved phrases, and Jon is doing bad things to his co-workers' brains by keeping those phrases in play on a near constant basis. Of course, my imagination is no help, as I view Jon rising to his full height and pointing a long long finger at one of the more persistant & difficult clients like a scene out of a Vincent Price movie in my head, with a storm raging outside the windows, and scary music, and Jon intoning in this deep and fearsome voice, "YOU!!! LLAMA-TOUCHER!!!!!" *with thunder shaking the room, crescendo of scary music, red lighting flashing on the walls* (perhaps one of the many folks who has changed his address twenty times in the last week, and honestly can't figure out why his checks haven't caught up with him yet-- Really, Jon says this happens all the time...of course, I may be misinterpreting, as he usually says it around a handful of Advil and Rolaids, and my deciphering skills are a bit rusty.)


More (actually interesting stories) to come...